Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Hallo Familie!!!!!
Hope you got my letter from last week! Mom I want you to know that I didn't forget about your birthday, I just had to send it a little late, but it is on the way.  Also I have one for Katie in there are well.  Its good to know that you are enjoying an empty house, who knew that getting rid of some kids would help you have more cake to yourself.  :)  I am a little jealous that you had angel food cake....  But Our desserts here are actually really good.  I enjoy them anyway, but we all know how much I love my sweets.  I did get some chocolate here, and it is awesome BTW!!! They have Kinder eggs here which are great cuz you get a prize too!!!!! (I know that all of you are laughing at me right now, so STOP)   
The language is slow...  And I mean really slow.  I have to keep reminding myself that I have only been here for 2 weeks and the fact that what I have learned is amazing.  It is just really hard to not be able to say what you want to say!!!  And we all know how much my opinion counts.  ( Again I know you are all laughing, but keep it to yourself.  :)) I just get so frustrated because I have something to say that would be soooo good for our lesson or for our investigator and I can't say it.  I hate it....  But slowly but surely it is coming.  I refuse to be silent for my whole mission. 
Overall though things are great.  Part of me really wants to get out into the field and get out of the MTC and another part of me is terrified to leave. Its a weird feeling. 
I did get to say goodbye to Blake this morning.  It was a really bittersweet moment.  part of me still thinks he is here and that I will see him again tomorrow.  But another part knows he is gone.  When he hugged me this morning and said see you in 2 years I totally lost it.  But he was crying too so that was ok.  The MTC president told us we had to stop hugging cuz we were making all he other elders jealous.  A few of the elders were there saying how great it would be to have a sister/brother there with them.  I am so grateful that it worked out that way.  God defiantly knows us all and what we need.  I was a little mad about Blake leaving me here all by myself with a bunch of Germans, but what can you do.  :)  My teacher is actually really great.  I had a small breakdown in class the other day.  They have been forcing us to speak in German as much as possible, which I know is good for me, yet when you don't know how to say it I was frustrated.  Silence is not my strong point.  (Again stop laughing at me) So she came over and said that she was worried about us sisters cuz we kept giving her blank looks.  Which was true, and I lost it a little.  I was just frustrated that I couldn't ask any of my questions or anything and I wanted to contribute to the lesson and participate, and I couldn't.  Not because I didn't want to, but because I really couldn't.  She thought that maybe I was crying because of my companion, cuz we were supposed to be doing companionship study at the time....  Oops...  So now she feels bad for me an when I give her a blank stare in a lesson she helps me out a little.  But I do feel that I am getting better and I just need to get over my self.  Like I said, most of the time I am great, but there are occasional times that I forget the big picture.  I know that I already know a ton and I wouldn't be this far if I was just in school. (which i am so grateful that I don't have to go back to right now!!!)  I know the Lord is helping me learn German and one day it will come.  I wish it would be sooner rather than later, but oh well.  the Lord knows me.
I love you all a ton!!!  You have no idea!!!  I miss you all so much, but at the same time I don't have a lot of time to feel sorry for myself.  :)  Blake is going to be great!!!  He is just a little nervous, but I think that once he gets out there he will love it.  He just needs to get a good companion.  Don't worry about him too much. Love you all!  
All my love, Sister Poll. :)

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